New Hamstrings To Sign For Hammers!

Having been linked with any and every striker that has a pulse in the last fortnight, West Ham have now apparently decided that there were so many options available that they needed to trim the list down drastically by narrowing their player acquisition criteria, the simplest way of doing so being to concentrate on the potential arrivees fitness levels, especially their hamstrings.

Having long been known as the retirement home with the kindest medical team for old past it and/or perpetually injured players, the Hammers hierarchy have come up with a 'cunning' plan, realising that star player Michail Antonio's only restriction that stops him from being a top WORLD player is his hamstrings! Consequently the club's search for a striker to work along side or even compete with the 30 year old fans favourite, is massively influenced by the long term fitness potential of who ever arrives.

It may seem daft, but the matter is as simple as that, the club need a player who can combine Antonio's physical presence with a turn of speed, but essentially a player who can do it week in week out, and to that purpose the name that keeps floating to the top is that of 23 year old Seviile hot property, Youssef En-Nesyri.

After failing with their usual low ball opening bid, the Irons will need to up the ante significantly if they are to prise away this genuine, if rough around the edges, player from Champion's League competitors Seville who are also riding high in their domestic League.

Hammers followed up their initial offer with a further failed bid of £22.5 Million rising to £27 Million for the Morocco striker, it is believed that West Ham's hierarchy have sanctioned a further improved bid of £25 Million rising to around £32 Million if the player hits certain targets with West Ham.

Unfortunately Sevilla don't want to play ball, and as such want at least £35 Million for En-Nesyri who has scored 13 goals in 26 games this season, sources close to the Spanish club insist they want a higher fixed fee, paid up front and not the instalments that have been offered.
Sevilla manager Julen Lopetegui doesn't want to lose En-Nesyri, who is one of his favourite players and is also the club’s top scorer, but talks are continuing with West Ham. Spanish teams like all their European counterparts are massively impacted by the Corona epidemic and, with the exception of Real Madrid, receive NO support from the Spanish Government.

At 23 years of age En-Nesyri does fit within David Moyes' template of young hungry players, this one could be a goer, so long as his hamstrings stand up to acute scrutiny! - Ed