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Even before the January transfer window closed West Ham United have confirmed that there will be no new additions to an already threadbare squad with the exception of the North East's 'Messi' Preston North End striker Jordan Hugill , who was an ideal West Ham signing because he was cheap and Hammers manager David Moyes stlll had a lot of sway at the club where he began his managerial career and was able to dig up enough dirt in order to get the 'deal' over the line.
Essentially Hugill is an Andy Carroll clone who is not as talented but is much much fitter, he will offer the plan B option that Moyes has been lusting after and may well prove to be a solid signing, but West Ham fans will have been quick to do the maths and have seen that Ayew and Sakho have yielded around £22 - 28 Million in revenue as opposed to the £9 Million in expenditure for Hugill and possibly £2 Million in agents fees and add ons for the Jaoa Mario transfer on loan from Inter.
There seems that there should have been at least an £11 Million war chest available for some late transfer activity given the recent out goings from the club however the closed sign has been put up at the London Stadium already meaning the publicly declared 'funds available' to David Moyes will not be utilised.
Since this year's ruling that clubs are no longer allowed to borrow money from off shore 'loan facilitators' against their prospective commercial activities West Ham United have been on the back foot financially, the same thing happened to Everton who were forced in to taking over seas owners in all but name because they were no longer able to 'rob peter to pay paul'. The venerable Bill Kenwright used the Bahama gate funding facility for years in order to keep his beloved club afloat but eventually was unable to continue the facade.
Maybe now is the time for West Ham United's owners to break the cast and say it how it really is to the legion of fans who will always support West Ham United come hell or high water, why not say "actually we are broke, we cannot borrow money as easily as we used to in the past and due to the high wages we have paid in order to try to compete with the other teams scrapping to stay in the Premier League we don't have a pot to piss in!
We at the Org think fans would be far more forgiving if they felt they were being fed the truth instead of a whole load of smoke and mirrors. - Ed
West Ham fans can be forgiven if they are feeling underwhelmed by Hammers transfer activity during this window, having been in the driving seat to bring in exciting prospects Smolov, Dendonker And Slimani they are now in the back seat of a cab scraping up the likes of Preston North End striker Jordan Hugill and Cardiff City's 33 year old defender Sol Bamba!
Smolov said of his failed move to the London Stadium: "Firstly, we are only one point behind [Spartak and Zenit] in the battle for a place in the Champions League," Secondly, I've spent two-and-a-half years in Krasnodar, and I think that the club has the right to receive decent compensation for my sale. The main motive for this move was for me to realise my dream of testing myself in one of the strong European championships. During this transfer window many negotiations were held, but there was no proposal that would be acceptable for the club and me. So I will continue to work and play in Krasnodar to help the team achieve results and prepare well for the World Cup, and in the summer I will wait for proposals that Krasnodar will suit and will meet my goals."
Preston North End striker Jordan Hugill, who is reportedly available for between £9 Million and £11Million from the Championship side, couldn't jump into the blacked out 'Hammer wagon' quick enough as he began his journey to have a medical ahead of his 'cut price' transfer, and the rumour linking Bamba from Cardiff to West Ham is a shock one considering Bamba has never played in the Premier League before, he did however begin his career at PSG, but really? Dendonker he is not!
Islam Slimani chose to take an executive jet to Newcastle instead of London in order to sign for the Toon, Mike Ashley's 'girls' looked after him 'all the way' apparently, his current injury is not the same problem for the Newcastle medical staff as it is for those at West Ham, must be something in the water!
It looks as if there will be a bit of a deja vu feeling about this transfer window, lots of talk followed by a negative spend anyone? - Ed
Having been knocked back in their loan attempt for Leicester City's Islam Slimani, the Hammers hierarchy who have been 'burning the book with both candles' in their efforts to bring in 'suitable' reinforcements are now able to concentrate on 'other' targets, none more so than Andelecht's Leander Dendoncker. Apparently the highly rated Belgian is still very interested in a move to the Premier League with West Ham and is keen to get a deal done before the transfer window shuts.

In order for a deal to happen Hammers would have to stump up more than €20 Million for the extremely talented 22 year old creative midfielder, who some might venture is a similar player to Joao Mario who West Ham just signed on loan for the rest of the season from Inter Milan. Hammers have had Dendonker watched on numerous occasions, Stuart Pearce even flew over to watch him just the other day so he is well thought of but maybe as a long term target, but what West Ham fans are calling out for is action by the board now! After all time and again they have been told funds are available for the manager to go ahead and strengthen his team, however David Moyes is well known for seeking 'canny' deals and managing on a shoe string, which is probably one of his traits that persuaded Hammers owners to offer him the job in the first place!
Much of the remaining business to be done relies on Andre Ayew being moved on, funds released by his sale added with the funds from Sakho moving to Rennes should be enough to 'go big' for Dendocker, who would have a really good sell on value even if things don't work out at The London Stadium given his young age.
There will obviously be many twists and turns obscured by smoke and mirrors before the transfer window closes and we shall do our best to keep you up to date as and when relevant news is available. - Ed
Fyodor Mikhaylovich Smolov is a Russian footballer who plays as a striker for Krasnodar, depending on which media outlet you use he is either super keen to ploy his trade in the Premier League with West Ham United at the 'iconic' London Stadium, or is super wary of joining a team that looks destined to struggle for the rest of the season with relegation a distinct possibility at the 'ironic' London Stadium. There is also the issue of Smolov being an untried player in the Premier League and the fact that Hammers would prefer to take the player on loan for the rest of the season whereas Krasnodar want a full sale at seems like a bargain £12 Million. Perhaps Smolov's words were not chosen wisely or were lost in translation when he said he would like to give it ( the Premier League) a go, it appeared that he didn't care about the destination more so the journey. Maybe that 'llaissez faire' attitude didn't go down well with Sergeant Moyes and Corporal Pearce!


With Diafra Sakho having already left the club earlier this week and Andre Ayew poised to return to Swansea in a near £20 Million deal, David Moyes will be left 'down to the bare 'arry's' when it comes to strikers, as Andy Carroll is out for the rest of the season and Marko Arnautovic will be out for a further three weeks at least. The unhappy Javier Hernandez is the only fit recognised striker left at Moyes' disposal and if a massive bid came in for him in the next few hours he could be off as well!
So the news that West Ham have begun negotiations to bring Islam Slimani from the King Power to the London Stadium will come as no surprise, of course the club are trying to do it on the cheap by offering to take the Algeria International who has struggled to start ahead of Jamie Vardy ever since he joined Leicester in a club record £29 Million deal in the summer of 2016 on loan. Leicester will want a massive loan fee and 100% of the striker's wages paid, in return West Ham get a player who has made 17 appearances in all competitions for the Foxes this season, scoring five goals but he has only made two starts in the Premier League.
Perhaps Slimani is yet another player burdened by such a high transfer price, his previous goal record for Sporting Lisbon (57 in 111 games) and his goals ratio for Algeria (26 in 55) shows that he knows where the back of the net is, the benefits of a high fee player changing environments has already started to reap rewards for West Ham with the signing of 'Super' Mario who has slotted right in to David Moyes' team since his arrival on loan from Inter Milan.
Of course, Slimani is a player in demand, yet again a good player doesn't become bad over night, Newcastle were in the running for Slimani's serviced but it is unlikely they can match Hammers' offer. Even if Slimani does arrive at the London Stadium there is still room for another forward, so why don't the Hammers hierarchy go for two and bring in Smolov? If he's a flop he can be sold on at little or no loss, and he would present a different option for David Moyes who has seen his painfully thin squad decimated, with an entire first team minus the goal keeper unavailable through injury.
Extra bodies are definitely needed, and it is assumed that Reece Oxford will not be sent back to ze Germans but retained for the rest of the season to 'plug up the gaps' that will almost undoubtedly need filling during the rest of the season given Hammers atrocious injury history.
The next few hours are crucial to West Ham's season, and more so their survival in the Barclays Premier League, come on David get your cheque book out, you know it makes sense! - Ed
Wednesday 31 January. 07:36. Rush Green. Mild. Dank. A hefty slice of uncertainty intermingled with a damp sense of confused anger.
The training ground was quieter than usual. David Boyles dragged the razor across his eyebrows to ensure a clean, smooth surface. Squeezing the last boil on his neck (a perennial problem since his teenage days which had blighted his career as a model) he took a sip from his camomile tea (infused with seaweed). Boyles knew what it meant to have a healthy body and mind.
Growing up in the slums of Scotland he’d endured hardship. Daily beatings from his sister, an absent mother, his workaholic father. A confused childhood, looking for mentors, dressing as a girl from the age of 3 – 15, David learnt to hide his feelings and grow a tough skin. Kids from the estate, nicknaming him “Davina” would throw haggis at him and take his dinner money.
Well not these days. No no-one put Boyles in the corner and threw haggis at him. No-one would ever take his money. And if he did have to spend money, he’d make damn sure he knew it was going to be money well spent.
Boyles was legendary for taking over an hour in the canteen to surmise the offerings before making his choice, even then bartering the price.
Doris, the canteen lady, had spent many an afternoon berating that “Gollum twat” (although never called him this to his face, she was too scared to look at him).
But Boyles was proud of his astute and thrifty management.
He knew this job was almost a last chance saloon from a premier league career point of view. Some questionable decisions had tainted his proud record at Preston and Everton. He knew the Utd job was a poison chalice. But after his game of strip poker with Fergee and Steve Bruuce, losing the game and being filmed dancing naked in a hot tub and signing the contract to succeed Sir Alix (a job everyone knew would be futile) he was on a downward spiral faster than a middle aged white man with an opinion.
Sky Sports cackled away in the background on the monitor and Boyles could see the headlights of the camera crews venturing outside the car park. Some dopey reporter would be spending the next 18 hours camped next to a tree in a north face jacket under a brolley commenting on passing traffic. One wonders what sort of aspirations these people had at the start of their careers.
The lead presenter on the TV, Jim Brown nose, notable through his quirky and completely funny yellow tie, appeared to be trying to fellate himself live on TV, a feat many agreed he tried regularly.
Boyles knew the task at hand had grown out of proportion since he had taken over. A squad in disarray fitness wise, multiple characters not buying in to team ethics and attitudes worse than Britain First supporter.
Boyles knew he would have to act fast to resolve, but this was so against his nature. He’d spent many hours poring over the targets, seeing if they would be compatible with the team for next week/month and beyond. This club was caught in a spiral of sticky plaster plans. The future seemed a dream and quick fixes were the order of the day. Boyles couldn’t work that way, but knew feelings on the terraces were high, action demanded, wallets opened.
This would be an entirely new challenge for the Scottish hunk…..
Across the Essex heartland Sully was enduring a similarly testing morning. The plastic ball in his mouth, held in place with a leather strap that was part of the gimp mask, dug into his teeth harder with each thrust.
The new “Brown star raider” (available @ £19.99 at all good adult outlets) was certainly exploring new territory. Mrs Sully particularly enjoyed this part of the arrangement. “Listen ‘ere ya facking midge, if yes carnt take itcha carnt give it do ya get me?” she squealed.
Sully had assumed the position (many deriving from this as the driving force of his retribution against fans) and had taken it like a man.
As each driving squeal was omitted, Sully sought tranquillity in trying to recite the list of free agents. Mrs Sully could tell he was wondering to those thoughts again and gripped the back of his hair, pulling back and thrusting the raider forward.
Sully felt as though a broom stick had been taken to him as his toupee was torn from his head, but it was the snapping sound that was of more concern. As robust as the raider was, it was no match for the powerful hips of Mrs S. The plastic phalice has sheared off halfway down. The end nowhere to be seen.
“Oh fackit! Well this is no bleedin good is it, where the fack dya git this made bleedin china?!” squealed the love of his life.
Sully knew something was up…..literally. “What the bloody hell have you done woman?!” roared Sully.
He felt down to his anus but nothing was there, “Its bleedin snapped orf!” moaned Mrs S.
“So where the ruddy hell is the other end?!” enquired sully, the tome of panic rising in his voice…..
”Ew….erm” Mrs S began to realise the significance of the situation.
“It’s in fackin side me isn’t it you daft trollop? What the facking ell ave you done? Its bloody deadline day and you’ve snapped a love length off in my crack?! They’ll bloody well ‘ang me!!!”
Sully began to sweat.
15 hours to quell the demand of a raging supporter base, and he was literally fucked.
“Quick, drive me to the ‘ospital now you daft mare, you got me in this!!”
Mrs Sully unclamped the strap on and put her fur (real) coat on.
“Bloody ell, I’ve got a nail appointment at 10 so if it aint sorted by the Guld to bring you back” moaned Mrs S.
Sully began sweating. A mixture of fear and uncomfortableness. How on earth was he going to get through this?
The sky sports van, parked outside the gate, were surprised by the screeching of tyres. Coffee and donuts were thrown to the dashboard. The long lens cameras were pulled from bags and the lead reporter fixed his earpiece, typing
“Movement at Sully HQ” into his mobile.
The response was instant.
Jim Brown nose knew his old friend would not let him down. Ample gossip and rumour would stoke his fires tonight as he stroked himself under the desk in front of the camera.
“We go live now to the Sully residence where we believe things are hotting up nicely!!”
The camera blinked into life. Boyles, just beginning his tofu and melon, was surprised by the developments. His email last night read “Keep schtum. Maybe a couple of loans, you don’t need to be involved”. His piercing eyes drawn to the screen.
“You join us here live at the Sully residence where I can tell you things are moving fast! We expected there to be developments and this is no disappointment!! Let us see if we can get a word with the owner now!” the intrepid reporter, giddy with excitement at being the first of his colleagues to generate a buzz.
However, it soon became clear whoever was driving was not paying sufficient attention to the driveway. Sully moans and protestations and he knelt on the backseat, fishing and grabbing hold of the end of the phalice, distracting Mrs S. Turning too late, the reporter was catapulted into the air. The car careering into the fence. The doors thrown open and its occupants discarded like oily rags.
An early morning audience had far more than they bargained for. Sully, in a leather cat suit, opened at the back with what appeared to be a half a broom handle sticking out of his backside.
Once the Fire Brigade had rescued the dazed reporter from the tree and taken statements from all concerned, Sully was allowed on his way to hospital. Jim Brown nose was sobbing uncontrollably in his dressing room, Sky Sports taken from the airways for the graphic showing which had gathered more than 1.2M complaints.
At Rush Green, the staff could not find Boyles. But the puzzling smell of haggis lingered in the air…..
Despite an injury ravaged squad i have to applaud moyes for still laying down the law to Antonio...being late to team meetings and training moyes showed he's not a man to be messed with by dropping him from the squad for the palace game....he would of been on the bench but nope he has shown lack of discipline and respect for club rules and unlike bilic who you suspect would of let him off with a warning moyes has showed the squad it does not matter the situation we are in you mess about there are consequences.
West Ham United: Adrian, Cresswell, Zabaleta, Byram, Rice, Collins, Kouyate, Noble, Joao Mario, Ogbonna, Hernandez. Subs: Hart, Fonte, Haksabanovic, Martinez, Cullen, Oxford, Quina.
Crystal Palace:Hennessey, van Aanholt, Tomkins, Fosu-Mensah, Kelly, Milivojevic, Bakary Sako, McArthur, Townsend, Zaha, Benteke. Subs: Speroni, Ward, Cabaya, Sakho, Chung-yong, Souare, Riedewald.
Swansea City have upped their offer for Andre Ayew to £18 Million for the player they sold to West Ham for £20 Million, and most Hammers fans would say "take it". Ayew's transfer to West Ham from Swansea began badly, he was Hammers record signing and his time at the club began badly as he got seriously injured on his debut match against Chelsea. When he was eventually fit he was used sparingly by Slaven Billic and latterly by David Moyes but never won the fans over who were astonished at the price paid for the attacking midfielder.

With rumours abounding about massive bids for several English based players, there is one bit of business that most Hammers fans find baffling, and that is why on earth have the club not snapped up Smolov" The English speaking Russian striker is available for £12 Million and is keen to ploy his trade at the London Stadium, and with the impending departure of Ayew along with the already gone Diafra Sakho, there is a desperate need for striking reinforcements, as David Moyes has clearly run the rule over Toni Martinez and found him wanting.
Hammers have apparently asked to take Smolarov on loan initially, but surely funds are available to make the transfer a permanent one now! At £12 million he represents a bargain in today's market, and even if he should fail and be unable to adapt to the Premier League he would surely be able to be sold on without too much of a loss.
Of course in amongst the transfer frenzy West Ham have the less than small matter of a crucial match against london rivals and fellow relegation strugglers Crystal Palace on Tuesday night at the London Stadium, Free Bets Uk are offering some interesting odds on the outcome given Hammers outrageous injury list, along with the damaging six match suspension that Authur Masuaku received for spitting at an opponent in the FA Cup tie against Wigan Athletic.
No one can accuse David Moyes of not 'giving the youth a chance', he has taken it upon himself to run the rule over as many of the youth players that he can reasonably do and has quite obviously concluded that most aren't quite up to it yet. Only Declan Rice has emerged as a serious first team candidate and possibly Josh Cullen, Sead Hakserbanovic arrived with great expectations placed on him, however he has yet to feature for David Moyes, it appears that proven players like Morgan Schneiderlin are more to his liking.
The Barclays Premier League is a bear pit of desperate and disparate clubs from tenth down, all the clubs are willing to make serious investments in order to avoid the dreaded drop, some more than others! The West Ham United hierarchy, and in particular David Sullivan are not stupid, they recognise relegation would be a financial and PR disaster of apocalyptic proportions but maybe they have been left behind in the football world, cheeky offers don't work anymore because there is always someone more desperate who will go the extra mile, sometimes they lose but sometimes they don't. The transfer market is an ever increasing board game that is now run on similar lines to stocks and share trading, old school logic has gone out of the window as clubs chase the rainbow.
Maybe its time for the two David's to sell on the club that they have already sold down the river! - Ed
Ex-Southampton player and Italian International Graziano Pelle's unlikely return to the Premier League has just got a lot closer with news that the player's representative has arrived in London to discuss Pelle's move from Chinese Super League club Shandong Luneng. Pelle obviously has the experience David Moyes requires to 'hit the ground running', but at 32 years of age any move for him would be expensive as he would have little or no sell on value at the end of the two and a half year deal that his agent is looking for.

6'4" Pelle is a proven Premier League goal scorer, having scored 23 goals in 68 appearances for Southampton before his lucrative move to China, and there in lies the problem of his potential move to the London Stadium as he is rumoured to be on £230,000 per week at Shandong. Realistically there is no way on heaven or earth that the Hammers hierarchy would countenance such an expenditure on one player's wages, Javier Hernandez is currently the club's highest earner and he receives £130,000 per week!
Playing football in China as an expensive import has it's draw backs, despite the massive wages on offer, many overseas players have cut short their contracts because of the 'gloomy' atmosphere, both politically with wide spread intimidation, and physically because of the terrible air quality. Pelle would have to take a huge pay cut in order to leave, and then there is the matter of whether Shandong Luneng want to accommodate the move, although it is common knowledge that they are keen to get the forward off their books as he hasn't exactly pulled up any trees since his fan fare arrival in the Summer of 2016.
Perhaps earning £13.5 Million per year for a year and a half was all that Pelle needed ? It should be remembered that Shandong paid Southampton just over £12 Million for Pelle, so including his wages he has already cost them over £25 Million for the 37 appearances he has made for them, scoring 12 goals in the process which equates to roughly just over £2 Million per goal, that's even more expensive than Andy Carroll! No wonder his club want to get him of the pay roll, with 18 months left on his contract he is set to cost them another £20 Million plus, recent regulation changes with regards to foreign players and financial clarity in China mean that clubs are no longer able to offer such lucrative contracts to more than two players in any given season.
It remains to be seen if David Sullivan, and HE is the one who makes all the final decisions when it comes to player recruitment despite his protestations, is willing to sanction a big money deal for a player who is clearly nearing the end of his shelf life. If there wasn't such an injury crisis at the club Sullivan wouldn't touch this deal with a barge pole, but with 'Sulkman' already gone to Rennes, Carroll in his usual perpetually injured state and Chicarito wanting out his hand may well be forced.
Are there any better players out there who could come storming to the rescue during this transfer window? Maybe, but you can bet your house that there is a Premier League manager or his technical director looking at every possible signing that can help his team stay in the promised land that is the cash rich Barclays Premier League, and that applies to any club from tenth place downwards. With so much money at stake clubs will take a risk in order to survive, it's just a question of how big a risk, as the lower leagues are full of teams that tried to 'have a go' and ended up overextending themselves with drastic consequences.
Like it or not the cash draw needs to be opened in the next three days! - Ed
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