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It’s All Hokey Pokey For Nuno Fate

Submitted by Louis Nixon on Mon, 05/01/2026 - 11:31

A recent surge of reports from certain stooges revealed that Nuno was on a tightrope come the end of the Wolves battering and that the inevitable sack was imminent, however, these statements have been quashed given that Nuno isn’t under any current threat.

The Hammers will have confirmed Taty Castellanos and the other forward signing of Pablo, two forwards whom Nuno requested himself, therefore spending €50,000,000 on the manager’s player to sack him a day later is on another level of incompetence… though if any club were to do it, it would be the Ol’ Hammers.

However, it would be abnormal for an action to make logical sense at West Ham and things aren’t always as they seem, it has been said that if the Hammers are to lose to Nottingham Forest on Tuesday night, Nuno will be under an immense amount of pressure seeing as many higher ups were more hopeful for the Brighton, Fulham and Wolves matches, certainly not expecting to get a lone point from the three in total.

Many are hopeful that the signings will be handy dandy and can push the Hammers away from relegation, with no wins in nine matches but a handful of draws picked along the way, Nuno’s closed the bridge to his former side, Nottingham Forest. A victory on the anticipated freezing Tuesday would place West Ham within a point, but a loss would have detrimental results for the table.

What is ongoing in the club is unknown, but at this moment in time, Nuno has 100% backing.

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Only West Ham could do that

mcbikeman's picture
Submitted by mcbikeman on Mon, 05/01/2026 - 08:25

Read this morning that the reason our new Striker did not get on the pitch at the weekend is because he is injured! give me strength....if this is true why was he on the bench? and why are we signing an injured player? ahh stupid me its West Ham it's what we do..just a small whiff of Romford Radiation has already done for him...

Managerial change is the only (remote) chance

Submitted by The Ironworker on Sun, 04/01/2026 - 14:16

I haven't posted on here for some years now, but with all the chatter going on about this, here's what I think.
A manager who can "win ugly" and grind out results is the only way to go. Forget the myth of "entertaining" football or weaving pretty patterns all over the field.
Sacking the manager is easy, the difficult part is appointing the right replacement, which to me is NOT Di Canio, Bilic, Parker etc.
I personally would never have appointed Espirito Santo, Potter or Lopetegui as all were for various reasons,"damaged goods".
Gary O'Neill is a possibility, as is Carrick, but I'd now be having a chat with Allardyce on a contract to the end of the season with an option for another year should we go down, as if that were to happen he'd get us back up.
That's my view, and as unpopular as it may be, feel free to fill your boots and c**t me off for it, but I'll back my judgement 100%.

Julia Smith

hammergirl's picture
Submitted by hammergirl on Sun, 04/01/2026 - 09:07

Has written a letter of complaint to David Sullivan claiming that the drama at West Ham is overshadowing her Drama writing on Eastenders and it has to stop as her ratings are falling! and oh how she needs a Villain as good as Nuno on her show right now.

Nuno Faces Heavy Defeat To Winless Wolves

Submitted by Louis Nixon on Sat, 03/01/2026 - 16:58

A broken record, a collection of replica CD’s or a satnav that only guides you to misery, you can determine your path as the Hammers handed Wolves their first victory of the season in festive fashion as the home side shipped three past us just 41 minutes in curtsey of cataclysmic clearances, delayed reactions and the gift of a third penalty in the space of in two matches.

The positives in the team? Null and void, doom and gloom, far from fetch, there are no positives to pick out when you face defeat to a team that had yet to win in 19 matches. No individual player had a good game and you just have to feel sorry for the poor buggers who made the trip to Molineux today in the hope we could have our first win in eight… instead, that’s now become nine.

Whilst it seemed typical fashion that West Ham would be the side to give Wolves their first win, most would’ve believed there was an underlying belief that we could’ve gone on to close the gap to Nottingham Forest, but if anything, we’ve gotten further away due to the goal difference!

Many thought that Nuno’s side were unlucky, but no, it’s the comical errors adding up and costing West Ham in the vital moments, Kilman’s mistake against Bournemouth and Brighton, provided stepping stones for them to get back into the game, Scarles’ error against Fulham, Magassa and Kilman making a mistake for Wolves’ second today which ultimately buried the game before the third had even gone in.

From Mavropanos’ and Kilman’s poor errors, to midfield nightmare’s and Summerville’s poor clinical ability, the team at the moment screams dire from the bottom to the top and if you could pin-point a result of dread and ‘where it all went wrong’ if you will, this result will likely become quite a popular choice come the end of the season. Of the few remaining optimists available, you’d be quick to mention that there’s only a four-point gap to safety… but if a sides getting battered by a described “hopeless” Wolves side, then what miracle is required for the utterly desolated Hammers?

An avid Premier League viewer would’ve seen the score this afternoon and believed that Wolves would’ve been a side that was mid-table, perhaps fighting for European Football, given the way that they played and relentlessly pressed Nuno’s side, forcing the Hammers out of the game for both halves with no way of coming back. That’s how far the Cherry’s fallen.

Nuno’s side will waddle over to the Bowl on Tuesday Night to take on Dyche’s Nottingham Forest, which will need to see a miracle occur for the Hammers to have a shot on target… let alone uttering and fathoming the idea of three points.

Three points or three pints? That’ll cost you £18.90, Sir. - LN

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Wolves vs West Ham Line-ups:

Submitted by Louis Nixon on Sat, 03/01/2026 - 13:45

Wolves: Sa, H.Bueno, S.Bueno, Gomes, Arias, Hwang, Arokodare, Mosquera, Mane, Krejci, Tchatchoua
Subs: Johnstone, Doherty, Wolfe, Andre, Strand Larsen, Chirewa, Hoever, Lopez, Gonzalez

West Ham: Areola, Scarles, Walker-Peters, Mavropanos, Kilman, Potts, Magassa, Fernandes, Bowen (C), Wilson, Summerville
Subs: Hermansen, Soucek, Mayers, Rodriguez, Pablo, Igor, Earthy, Kante, Golambeckis, Mayers

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I think this story sums us up

Dartford Bhoy's picture
Submitted by Dartford Bhoy on Fri, 02/01/2026 - 14:32

I was at the Brighton game, mad I know and will be at the Forest game.

Most unusually I left early, the trains were a mess and I couldn't afford to miss a connection as this would have added nearly an extra two hours to the journey, next week I will drive!

So having left about 5 mins early I headed fleet of foot to Stratford with a fair few others chuntering about the game and lack of defense, lack of this, lack of that, the usual stuff.

When I got close to Westfield, just outside the station and the last point of the marshals slowing or stopping / halting the crowd, the main Marshal / Steward thought it ever so funny to play through his phone and the loudhailer Monty Python Life of Brian Always Look On The Brightside of life.

Nothing wrong with that you might think, where's your sense of humour but... the pri** was wearing a Chavski Beanie!!!

Thousands marched past with zero reaction... Including me!

The more mature Orgers would probably agree that such an event was never seen at Upton Park, there would have been a mini riot and said *rick would have had the loudhailer shoved somewhere intermit! In short no one would have dared such a stunt and take such a liberty!!

I just thought on the train that I was totally wrong about the move to the BoM and all my initial positivity had evaporated. It really was the moment our club truly died, we lost our heritage, our culture... in the words of every away fan to the BoM "We sold our soul for this ****hole!"

I have backed the BS OUT campaign and will continue to give them support.

Second Signing Imminent After ‘Taty’ Price Agreed

Submitted by Louis Nixon on Thu, 01/01/2026 - 19:59

Tit for Tat! The Hammers have agreed an eye-watering €29,000,000 for Taty Castellanos, who’s an Argentinian currently playing for Lazio.

The forward had suffered a falling out with Lazio manager, Maurizio Sarri and it has come across as destined for the Argentinian to leave this transfer window. The forward found London to be a ‘dream’ place to move, and it has been said that he has been a significant driving force to ensure that the deal can come together.

The Hammers are now set to sign their second striker in the span of just two days, whichis good considering that Nuno is receiving the backing that he’s been crying out for, but ‘Taty’ has had a bumpy time, initially signed for €15,000,000 last season, he acheived 22 G/A across 40 games in the Serie A & Europa League combined, it all seemed to be a great signining until the forward fell out with the manager, struggling for minutes and has musered up 5 G/A in 11 appearences this season.

16 Goals across 74 games doesn’t exactly scream prolific, nor does it seem a sufficient player that you’d aspire to have to drag you out of a relegation fight, but is the glass half full or empty, beggars cannot be choosers off whom they get… Brownie points will be offered seeing as he’s ‘desperate’ to play for the club.

If all is to go to plan, given that the medicals are passed, the Hammers could find themselves going into the Wolves match with three first-team strikers, which’ll be the first time since the 2018/19 season… Hammers fans can only hope that these possible three are better than the likes of Hugil, Ol’ Andy & Lucas Perez!

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Hammers Close In On ‘Ferocious’ Forward

Submitted by Louis Nixon on Thu, 01/01/2026 - 10:00

It’s the 1st of the month, but it’s not April Fools! West Ham United seem set to make their first signing of the January transfer window and it’s for the Portuguese international Pablo.

The Pablo deal has excelled at a rate not many would’ve anticipated given West Ham’s previous negotiation tactics, but today, the youngster will undergo his medical in London, seeing as a fee has already been agreed, as well as personal terms.

The fee for Pablo certainly isn’t pennies, it’s a €20,000,000 fee, but he has been deemed the ‘best’ value for money signing of the forwards by members of the board. However, what has warranted him to be worth said amount is his 10 goals across 14 appearances. Whilst he’s in the Portuguese League and more often than not certain players end up struggling when moving to a Top 5 League, that doesn’t mean he can’t become good. Factoring in his age and form, it’s the reason as to why their asking price was £17,500,000, and the club swiftly agreed to the fee, which seems to be the most surprising factor of the deal entirely, quick business.

Pablo is also the son of retired Brazilian striker Pena, who played with Nuno for two years (2002-2004) whilst the pair were both at Porto.

Not too much can be said upon Pablo, it’s difficult to comment upon previous seasons given that he’s an emerging forward and this appears to be his breakout season, the club are hoping that he is ready to continue his striving form into the Premier League and are confident to conclude a deal BEFORE the fixture against Wolves, to ensure he could be an option to play in what is the most crucial game of the season so far.

Work is ongoing in the background for Adama Traore and after three failed attempts previously, it seems that Nuno will indeed get his man, but for the time being, the focus remains on the prevalent Pab deal getting over the line - LN

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Happy New Year Orgers

mcbikeman's picture
Submitted by mcbikeman on Thu, 01/01/2026 - 07:43

I'm up and about and off to work and my new years resolution is to be more positive about how West Ham will fair the rest of the season and to look on the bright side i mean as i write this we are unbeaten in 2026 COYI we can still get into Europe.

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